Additionally, in speed-dating events where the characteristics of the daters varied much more, most participants did not follow up with any of their matches. Results observed in the world of online dating support this finding. A study in by Lenton and Barbara Fasolo of the London School of Economics and Political Science indicates that participants often misjudge how the number of options available to them will affect their feelings. Participants presented with a broad array of potential partners more closely aligned with their anticipated ideal did not experience greater emotional satisfaction than when presented with fewer options.
Prior research by Lenton and Francesconi provides some insight into why people might struggle with speed dating. They found that when the number of participants in a speed-dating event increases, people lean more heavily on innate guidelines, known as heuristics, in their decision making.
In essence, heuristics are ingrained rules of thumb that allow us to save effort by ignoring some of the information available to us when we evaluate our options. For example, in those events with a relatively large number of participants, the researchers discovered that people attend predominantly to easily accessible features, such as age, height, physical attractiveness, and so forth, rather than clues that are harder to observe, for example, occupation and educational achievement.
These rules of thumb are evolutionarily adaptive, however, and not necessarily a bad thing. Millions of years of experimentation with different heuristics, conducted in a range of environments, have led us to learn which ones are most effective.
Very generally speaking, good looks and youthful vigor are indeed useful metrics for mating because they signal health. Yet if lifelong love is what you are after, a smorgasbord of singles might propel you to make stereotypical selections. Know Your Environment One problem with both speed dating and online dating may arise from how we hunt for the things we want.
Some items can be found with a simple search targeted at objective qualities. So-called search goods include laundry detergent and vitamins. In a study published in psychologist Dan Ariely of Duke University and his colleagues set out to demonstrate that when it comes to dating, people are the ultimate experience goods. They asked 47 single men and women to list the qualities they look for in people they would consider either marrying or dating.
Independent evaluators then rated the characteristics as either searchable or experiential. In both conditions, men and women mentioned more experiential traits—nearly three times more for dating partners and almost five times more for spouses. They note that using attributes such as weight and height to choose a partner is similar to trying to predict the taste of a food based on its fiber content and calories.
A similar argument could be made for speed dating, in which the conversation can resemble an interview more than a fun experience. In an upcoming book, Lenton, Fasolo and their colleagues summarize the key message of recent research: how we end up choosing our wives, husbands, boyfriends and girlfriends is a function of the social environment in which the decision is made. To conserve both mental exertion and time, we judge potential partners by comparing them with others we have encountered rather than by measuring them against some cognitive ideal.
In a study, for example, Raymond Fisman of Columbia University and his colleagues showed that when participants in a speed-dating event were asked what they seek in a potential partner, their answers did not match what they ended up finding attractive during the event. What we select depends on what else is being offered.
Becoming aware of that malleability in our taste, and gaining control over our decision-making strategies in response, is known as ecological rationality. It is equally important when choosing between jams at the grocery store and partners to date; the only difference is the stakes. If you do attempt speed dating, avoid static, standardized conversations. Annual income and body mass index, after all, cannot give you that warm, fuzzy feeling inside.
To obtain more experiential information, try telling a joke or casually mentioning that you plan to go, say, bungee jumping next month to see how he or she reacts. Perhaps if I had been more ecologically rational a few years ago, my speed-dating experience would have been more successful as well. You have free article s left. If you don't want to waste your time or labor money manually figuring out who said "yes" to gay speed dating nyc ….
Lining up plans in Killeen? Could it much easier when you have ever seen. Our events take singles co avon place in restaurants, lounges and other upscale venues. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Gay speed dating nyc. Bellagio speed dating gay speed dating chicago alexa speed dating switch date speed dating And now we're on YEAR 3! Speed dating business networking Could it much easier when you have ever seen.
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